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Written by Gayle Nobel
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Thursday, 29 July 2010 13:05 |
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Blog-a-thon: Day 3
Voice from the Autism Spectrum: Perspective on Change
Those of you who read my newsletter each month will be familiar with the writing of Sam. If not, Sam is a friend of mine who has Asperger’s. Asperger’s is considered to be on the high-functioning end of the autism spectrum. I first became acquainted with Sam when I interviewed him for my blog over a year ago. He had been given a copy of “It’s All About Attitude” by a mutual friend and really enjoyed it.
Sam is just a little older than my own son. Unlike my son, he is able to communicate very clearly and share his experiences as a person with autism. I can always depend on Sam to have something insightful to say about a topic.
This month I asked Sam to write about “change”. I will be sharing his thoughts in two parts. His discussion of change comes in the second part. The first part is a lead up which provides valuable insights and information on autism.
Before I do, however, I would like to share a little story about Sam. A few months ago, I was doing a book signing at an Arizona Autism Coalition meeting. I was pleasantly surprised to see Sam walk in the room. He greeted me with a big hug. At the end of the meeting, he was extremely helpful in assisting with packing up my large collection of Attitude and Breathe goodies. He made it a point to let me know he would walk me out to the car so I wouldn’t have to be in the parking garage alone at night. When we got to the garage, he proceeded to load all the bins into my car. I did not ask him for any of this help. He initiated it.
I share this with you because this experience, these interactions with Sam, are not what I would typically expect of someone with Asperger’s. I sheepishly admit this is based purely on stereotype (sorry Sam). Sam is a real “gentleman” and these days, those can be hard to find.
Sam Speaks from the Spectrum
Q: What is the biggest thing you have to deal with when interacting with others? How does change affect that?
A: Apples and Oranges.
Studies have actually shown that the entire structure of an Autistic person's brain is different from a non-autistic. In essence, the neurology of our brains connects differently. (http://www.wrongplanet.net/article356.html)
Many regions of the brain that are thought to be involved with autism appear to be smaller in older autistic brains. Regions such as the hippocampus (involved in spatial learning and memory), amygdala (involved in emotional processing, learning and memory), cerebellum (variety of cognitive and motor functions), and frontal/temporal lobes (social and communicative functioning) all have been reported in various studies as having a decrease in size. In some cases, these structures are deteriorated which may correlate with dysfunction in the processes these structures are involved with.
In essence, this means that an autistic person is not disabled, but different. In other mental disorders, chemical imbalances may be the leading cause of a person's behavior. For example, depression being linked to serotonin levels. However, with autism the differences are caused by the wiring of the brain.
This leads me personally into social issues. In essence, how do two people deal with emotions when they both experience them differently? How would a person who’s idea of tact involves brutal honesty deal with someone who's idea of tact leads them to be careful about their responses?
My answer would be communication. Personally, I have a non-autistic friend who comes with me to the support groups that I go to, as well as spending time with the same friends I make in these settings. When she complains that she cannot connect with them, I remind her that that is what I go through when I'm in many social settings. If I cannot find an autistic, I usually fail to make an emotional connection.
In essence, the biggest issue I run across in social settings is advocacy. Some people that I've talked to solve this by carrying around business cards describing them (or their child) as autistic and how that affects their behavior. They can hand them out to strangers who see them in public and make comments to them. This, in turn, appears to help ease potentially embarrassing situations.
Stay tuned for Part 2.
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Written by Gayle Nobel
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Wednesday, 28 July 2010 10:55 |
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Blog-a-thon Day 2
Change seems to be a recurring theme for the last several months. Besides all the changes going on within my personal life (especially with my kids), inspirational passages keep showing up in the books I am reading and some of the emails I receive. I plan to make “change” a recurring theme throughout this blog-a-thon, as well.
I have a wonderful deck of 52 “No Place Like Om” inspirational cards that sit on my desk. (www.NoPlaceLikeOmYoga.com- Sandi Greenberg) Each morning I randomly pick a card. Usually the message is exactly what I need to hear for the day.
Recently, I happened to choose “Embracing the New”. I hope you will find it as inspiring as I did.
Embracing the New
“Letting go of the old and familiar, even when not serving us particularly well, may often be more comfortable than taking risks to change those things. Looking forward to new changes, new choices, and fresh starts fills us with hope, excitement, and often fear of the chances we might have to take and unknown territory we have to face. It takes courage and faith in ourselves and then some introspection to seek who we really are, to hear the voice of our heart, and then embrace the newness that awaits us.”
Sandi then goes on to suggest an action.
"Journal about what you would like to change in your life, what you want to let go of and stop giving energy to, remembering that “Growth demands a temporary surrender of security.” (Gail Sheehy) Ready, set, grow!"
Love it! “Growth demands a temporary surrender of security.” That’s one for the refrigerator, isn’t it?
Bonita Creek, AZ- Makes you want to "Breathe" doesn't it?
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 28 July 2010 11:09 |
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Written by Gayle Nobel
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Tuesday, 27 July 2010 22:04 |
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Blog-a-thon: Day 1
I’m excited to get back to writing/blogging on a more regular basis. I invite you to travel along with me as I begin my own personal mid-summer blog-a-thon. My intention is to share inspiration and information for the journey of living well with autism, whatever YOUR autism may be. Autism is a metaphor for life’s challenges so in a way, we are all living with autism in some form or another.
“Breathe” works for wee ones too!
Last week I was sitting in the waiting room at LIFE, the center where my son Kyle goes to occupational and music therapy. This is a wonderful place, hence the 55 minute drive one way to get there each Tuesday. Besides his amazing, insightful, and very patient therapists (Angela, Kathleen, & Rich), I am often impressed by the staff/child interaction I observe in the halls and waiting rooms.
Every Tuesday, while I am waiting for Kyle to finish his OT session, a group of little ones files through the waiting room on their way to the therapy room for PE. These are all very young kiddos with special needs of some type. Usually, someone is crying/tantruming on the way in or out. As the group was going in last week, a boy began screaming and crying. Ever so patiently, his teacher spoke gently to him reminding him he would not be able to join the class for PE if he continued to scream.
What I saw after this was very special! She asked him to take some deep breaths. This little guy (no more than about 5) got quiet and took a few deep breaths. He was adorable as he tried so hard to take those big exaggerated breaths. I couldn’t help but smile. Then, lo and behold, he was able to get himself together and stop crying for awhile. After that, he could use words to tell his teacher what he wanted.
Once again, I got to experience the magic of the breath but in a different context.
Does this mean “Breathe” can work at any age? I believe so.
This scenario could have gone so many ways particularly if the teacher had chosen to match the boy’s upset with her own upset. His teacher was a shining example of being responsive rather than reactive. She appeared so calm as she taught a powerful lesson. I imagine it was a lesson she needed to teach often with this particular boy. And, I imagine she must have been “breathing” too :-).
I was moved as I got to observe “Breathe in action”. What a great reminder of the beauty, simplicity, and effectiveness of the simplest tool. Breathe!
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Written by Gayle Nobel
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Wednesday, 14 July 2010 14:15 |
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I recently became a ‘vacation sponge’ when I traveled to Colorado for five days. Feels like I got to experience so many of the oxygen-rich tools from “Breathe” all in one trip. It was a much needed break from the responsibilities of being Kyle’s mom and the extreme heat of the Phoenix summer. I returned recharged and ready to take on my life with renewed energy. And just to test the waters, Kyle is in a rough place right now, a place he has not been in for a long time. I try to take a piece of my own advice and remember “this too shall pass”. But this is for another blog post on another day.
Here’s a sample....
1- APPRECIATION- Part of the reason for this trip was to celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary. Great opportunity to reconnect with my husband & appreciate us (as a couple), as well as how hard he works to help make these trips possible. And yes, I remembered to tell him. :-)
2- HARMONY- We got to visit with our daughter Rachel (the photographer for “Breathe”) and her sweetheart JB. It was so wonderful to hike together and spend time laughing and enjoying each other away from the world of autism for awhile. Harmony in my family, harmony within me.
3-GRATITUDE- Just a look around at the gorgeous greenery and mountains of beautiful Colorado, sit near a waterfall, and breathe that incredible cool, clean fresh air and I felt grateful to be alive and in that very moment. AHHH!
4- REST- so much rest. Physical rest and mental rest... reading a book without interruption, sitting in the hot tub in the rain. Loved all that rest.
5- MOMENTS- many, many moments. I look at our photos and am reminded of all those beautiful moments. Special times with people I love, seeing my daughter so happy, looking out at the mountains, holding my husbands hand. A string of moments. Spent most of this vacation in the present moment too (lovely).
6- INSPIRATION- “Inspiration is another brand of love.” (Breathe) Inspiration is everywhere in Colorado. Makes me want to write again and wish I could paint.
7- REACH OUT- This trip could not have been possible if I had not asked for help so Kyle could be at home with the best possible people... Deshay, Jamie, Kim and Henrietta ...thank you. So grateful for the support available to me to take care of my son when we are away.
8- SUNRISE- we slept thru the sunrises but definitely got to see some sunsets... so beautiful behind the snow capped Rocky mountains.
9- EXERCISE- “Exercise produces endorphins, and endorphins make us happy. It is vital nourishment for my soul.” (Breathe) Exercise is my magic potion and I got lots of it hiking and biking the mountains of Colorado.
10- BREATHE- had to breathe deeply in that altitude. Wow! Hiking at 10,000 ft.+ is just not the same as 2000 ft. on the mountain behind my house. This was a challenge for me. Had to work pretty hard to motor up some of those steep trails. However, the experience was worth every deep breath. And, I was grateful for all those stops for photo ops :-).
I promise not to write about every chapter title in Breathe, although I think I could very well do that. Trying to live by “more is less” so these are just a few that stood out for me as I pause to reflect on our recent time in Colorado.
Would love to hear of some of YOUR experiences with the oxygen-rich tools. Anyone?
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Last Updated on Wednesday, 14 July 2010 14:48 |
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