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Blog-a-thon Day 21
Kyle got me up at 4:40 again this morning. Happy and full of joy, he was ready to begin his day. I didn't mind because today ia a PLUS 3.
I've written on and off about Kyle's cycles. Out of respect for his privacy, I have not gone into the intimate details. I have explained how the forces that be take him and replace him with someone who suffers almost every moment of every day. They begin suddenly and end suddenly. They last for 8-10 days. Often they have followed the pattern of the full moon. One thing is for sure: they have been coming on an every two week schedule for a long time.
I don't mark my calendar because I don't want to plan on another cycle. In my mind, each cycle is the last one. Or should be. I am waiting for one of the interventions (drug or natural) to be the solution, the fix.
The cycles have been going on since July of 2010. Before that, he was cycle free for 5 years. The first few were very very rough. We did not have doctors on board. I had Rachel's wedding fast approaching complete with five french house guests. Thanks to some fantastic friends and helpers, we got excellent medical help and respite support with Kyle. It was very challenging, but we managed to work everything out.
I have struggled with the reality of Kyle's cycles for months and months. In a strange way, each one gets a little easier. I am adapting. I have gradually been in the process of becoming more accepting. Yes, we are still working on a solution and I believe there is one out there. We just haven't found it yet. In the meantime, life goes on.
I don't like to see Kyle suffer and have his active, happy life come to a halt but that has been the reality. The less I struggle against it, the more peace I can find in the midst of the storm. It's a process and a work in progress. Not easy.
As we were approaching the two week mark this past Wednesday, Neil and I were giving each other the look. Is he or isn't he? To compound the matter, Kyle was not feeling well for a couple of days. Was his "off-ness" a sign that something was coming? Sometimes it is. But it turned out he was just sick. False alarm. Phew!
As we got one day past the two week mark, I had an epiphany. Each day past the two week mark is a gift! I will gladly accept any such gifts and will count them until we get to 365. Or 3.
Today is a PLUS 3. I'll take it!
I am very grateful.
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